For many of us, it’s so easy to identify with a story about all of our problems. My boss is a jerk, it’s too hot, I’m so busy, my back hurts, allergies are really bad this year, this idiot cut me off in traffic, and on and on.
In this line of thinking, stuff happens and somehow or other we’re a perpetual victim. Who cares that much of this is out of our control or that few of these situations truly arise to being much of a real problem at all. Indeed, to paraphrase Eckhart Tolle, “the problem is not the problem, the problem is our thinking about the problem.”
Yet, for me, it’s interesting how rarely our narrative includes owning up to a botch, a blunder, a mess we made, our glorious failure or bungled experiment.
Sometimes it’s just too painful to admit we took a chance and it didn’t work out.
Sometimes we’re scared to say “here I made this” and face criticism or outright rejection.
Sometimes, we conveniently ignore our role in a less than desired outcome.
Of course, sometimes there can be no botch, because we took no risk. The fact is it’s almost always easier to do nothing.
Growth doesn’t come from rehashing life’s little inconveniences or slights. It comes from taking the leap and exposing ourselves to the harsh light of both the tribe and the trolls. It’s not about trying to avoid the botch, it’s about being prepared to fail, fail again and fail better.
Ultimately we must make a choice. Will it be “V” for victim or “V for Vulnerable”?