I wish I could count how many times I’ve given advice to others that, while perfectly suited to my own circumstances, I’ve never taken.
I wish I could resist being irritated by character flaws or annoying behavior among friends, families and (sometimes) even random people on the street. Of course, usually what irks me in them is some reminder of my own perceived shortcomings.
Why is it so easy for me to notice your failings while conveniently ignoring my own?
Why do I feel better pointing the finger at someone else, when really it should be pointed right back at myself?
Carl Jung pioneered the notion of the shadow self, describing how we often project our perceived, often unconscious, inferiority onto others while being unable or unwilling to see these traits in ourselves.
Debbie Ford–until her untimely death last year–and quite a few others have carried forth Jung’s work and expanded it in many useful ways.
In 12 Step groups “you spot it, you got it” is a familiar refrain.
And believe me, I’ve heard the phrase “consultant heal thyself” more than a few times.
None of this should be news. But I sure need to be reminded of it quite often.
I am aware that when I remember to spend less time worrying about you, and more time focused on the things within my control, things go a whole lot better for me.
I accept that when I attend my own lectures most of the time I have all the knowledge I truly need.
And then it’s time to act.